Nostalgia Is An Illusion: So Why Do We Live In The Past?

I listened to a great sermon this past weekend. One of the statements that were made was that nostalgia is an illusion. Meaning that some times when we think about what was, we get caught up on the “highlights” of that particular event during a certain time in our life. When we are looking at the past, we only see the “highlight” reel. We forget about the bad stuff and only focus on the good stuff. For instance if you were in a bad relationship and some time has passed and you start thinking about that relationship some how you forget the reason why you left it. The loop that is playing in your head over and over is all of the good stuff “highlights”. Often time we get stuck looking back versus forward.

I’m guilty of that myself. Sometimes when I think about New York and all of what I had going on before I left, It’s a lot of “highlights”. I had a great community of friends; we were connected spiritually and creatively. I had a lot of great things happening acting wise, and I was being fed spiritually at my church. So one may wonder, why did I leave? Well honestly I always wanted to live in LA and I felt it was time to make a change. Fast-forward to me now living here, the first two years were very good. Acting was cool, I was starting over in some sense but I knew way more or so I thought than what I did when I was started out in NY. I always equate acting in LA like this, I was a junior in New York, I transferred to LA and they didn’t accept all of my credits so I was a freshman again. Which was partly ok with me, but only because I knew what I knew, I was going to skip my sophomore year in LA and become a junior again. I’m actually laughing as I write this sentence. Well when things did not happen according to how I thought it would, I started to become nostalgic about New York and all I had going on before I left, basically to a point that I allowed it to make me stagnant. I wasn’t forward moving, I took my eye off the ball and allowed someone or something else to pilot my plane. That is a topic for another blog.

You all may be thinking Candice, there is nothing wrong with a little nostalgia and I agree. However you have to put things in perspective, nostalgia is only going to show you the “highlights” of where you come from. In fact in my case, I never thought about all the hard work I put into acting when I was in New York, I was stuck on all the good things I was doing when I became nostalgic. I forgot about how long it actually took me to find a church that I liked and was being fed; I was only remembering the feedings. I say this, because as we move forward or as Pop’s says in “Luke Cage”, forward moving. The past is simply that the past. It isn’t real anymore it doesn’t exist. Now that doesn’t mean you don’t learn from your past, but do that take the lesson and move forward. You are a different person today than you were yesterday. Think about it, you are older; you have a little more knowledge, because hopefully you learned something and even if you think you did not, you did. You have an opportunity to start a new, create something different the next day. You cannot change the past. I for one even with all of the things I been through in life, would not change the past. It makes me who I am today. Each day I get a chance to do something new. Looking forward is so much better than looking backwards. Forward thinking, forward moving has hope, opportunity, and new blessings.  All you have to do is take the step. If you take any great athlete they are always forward moving. If they set a record, believe me they are thinking how they can break their record, that is the only way they get better, by improving and moving forward.

As we begin to round out this year, please do not get stuck in the past, meaning when 2017 hit, do not think crap so much bad stuff happened in 2016. I didn’t complete this, I didn’t do that, he/she broke my heart. Instead when your eyes open in 2017 thank God for his mercies and allowing you to see another day and then get excited about what is to come. Leave 2016 in 2016,because if you sowed seeds in 2016 and they did not harvest they will in the future not the past. Besides you can’t go back and get them.